Thursday, January 15, 2009

Fun with Rhymes

I first started writing poetry as a kid when I discovered I had a knack for putting together snappy verses that rhymed. It was more or less the foundation of every poem I wrote from about Grade 2 into junior high. But in junior high I grew up a little and was more exposed to pretentiousness and suddenly felt like all my poems were childish. Now I was reading poems by famous writers and a lot of them didn't rhyme at all. Some girls I knew were also writing the odd poem and none of them rhymed either. They were just a bunch of words about pain and isolation strung together. No rhythm, no iambic pentameter. Just words.

Impressionable youth that I was, it was time for me to get in on this. So I started writing dark poems with no rhymes. My writing was maturing and I'd venture to say that perhaps 2 percent of them weren't complete crap. Anyway, even when I came out of this phase and almost stopped writing poetry altogether for awhile, those few poems that I did write still didn't rhyme. I had just gotten used to expressing myself that way. If rhyming no longer seemed childish to me it still seemed...tacky. So for another few years I ignored my gift some more. In that time, I think I did manage to write a handful of not too bad non-rhyming poems. The best of which being one called "Afternoon" that I wrote about three weeks into my first year of university, looking out at the "quad" of King's College.

But a few years after that a friend of mine who is also a writer wrote a poem about a hurricane that we'd recently experienced and he showed it to me. I don't remember it now but I remember it was good. I also remember that it rhymed. And it wasn't childish. It wasn't tacky. It was good. This caused me to do some thinking. Could I write a rhyming poem that wouldn't suck? I didn't know. For a couple days I bounced some ideas around in my head, trying to come up with just a few lines to start with. It wasn't working. But then about a week later, I was staring at the page and a simple rhyming verse came to me. I barely had to think - I just wrote and it came. It wasn't until I was nearly finished that I read it over and realized the subject matter - it was about my breakup with my first ever girlfriend. Not a recent event in my life at the time, in fact, I'd already been through a few other disasters since then. But that's what it was.

I don't really like posting a complete work here no matter how worthless it may be but I figured it couldn't hurt. It's called Drive and here it is.

Drive

i sometimes drive alone at night and listen to my songs
my focus drifts away and i think of what went wrong
it wasn't all that long ago i made this drive with you
sighing, laughing, dreaming
now all of that is through

every signpost sparks a memory
every corner prompts a thought
i think of you in your new place while i stay here and rot

i need to get away from this
before in these thoughts i drown
so i turn the volume up and i press the pedal down

not too far past your bridge we used to go sometimes
how fitting now to use it to pay you for your crimes
the sights aren't so familiar now because now they are a blur
i think of what they might say
"he died because of her"

i give the wheel a good jerk
and now i'm in the air
soon to be another victim of a life that isn't fair

the water's cold, the water's dark
and that suits me just fine
it seems a proper punishment for believing you were mine

eventually i slip below
where everything is black
it's quiet and it's calm here
but still i want them back
the days we had, the nights we shared
i still can't let them go

i forgive you now
i'm sorry
but you will never know

2 comments:

RyHoMagnifico said...

Man, well done. I don't often like rhyming poems myself. I'm more into the massive narrative ones (that I always find border on not even being poems anymore) but this was very well done.

Eye-opening, really. Feel free to post some more.

Anonymous said...

Good poem man, I get behind all poems that use rhyme, but I can see how for a while you felt like it was childish or tacky method. It's not surprising when most rhyming poetry we're exposed to is from children's books or greeting cards.

I've loved writing poems my whole life, as you know, and rhyming has always been my style. I blame influences like Shel Silverstein and Roald Dahl when I was growing up. In a way, when I read non rhyming poetry it's pointlessly abstract, or just screwing around with spacing. With rhyming poetry I feel it's more of a creative effort and it gives it rhythm and a musical quality. It's like the reader can hear the music based on your poetic lyrics.

Anyway, that's what I thought. You got me thinking about poetry again, and I think I'll give it another whirl. As for you, keep 'em coming.